Frequently Asked Questions About Santa Barbara's Band BEER:30

Each member of BEER:30 has decades of onstage experience and still maintains that youthful glow of the prime partying demographic. BEER:30's energetic ability to work the crowd and perform at the highest level is a rare combination not often found beyond the ear shot of any BEER:30 show.

No venue or event is too big and no stage is too small.... or wierd for that matter.

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BEER:30 has MAD SKILLZ that’s why!

What that means is that they understand that it's all about bringing in the business. Couple that with rare talent and you will always get a memorable, and successful show of the highest order.

Take advantage of our top quality full color fliers promoting our show for your venue.
&
Make use of the 12 ft. vinyl banner for display across the front of your venue.

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The answer is YES! BUT...you must take a serious
moment and consider what you are getting yourself into!
Please ask yourself the following questions;

Would I get satisfaction seeing my mother in-law wonder what the heck's going on!

Will I laugh out loud when my sister's second husband falls off a table!

Would I take a picture of Grandma doing the freak dance!

Do I want all my friends to have the best time they ever had!

If you answered "YES" to at least one of the following
questions then we can make it happen for you!

If you did not answer yes to any of these questions
PLEASE don't hire us! Get yourself a DJ instead!

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The answer is YES!
Let your employees know they work for the coolest company ever!

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What Does BEER:30 Mean Anyhow?

It's simple! Every one of us hard working stiffs...

...that have become familiar with that dull, numbing, sensation from
the monotony of doing our duty day in and day out...

...often ask "Hey man, What time is it?".

No matter what time the clock might say...
The appropriate answer is always BEER:30!

Because when it's BEER:30
It's time for a Great, Kick Ass, Party!!!

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Why did you guys name your band BEER:30?

BEER:30 is the time when the fun begins!

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BEER:30 has plenty of sound and lighting equipment!

Their professional sound, lighting, and video projection systems insure that dance floors of any size, bars or wedding receptions indoors and outdoors will have an impressive impact!

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What the... ... Why is... ...Is that bass cut in half???

"I got it at a half off sale!"

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No, Bryan is not single...

...but Peter IS!!!

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Where is your contact link on your web site?

You can email us through any one of the following links or call us at 805 252-2155.

smilin24777@yahoo.com

Mailing list

Book Us

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BEER TROUBLESHOOTING GUIDE
SYMPTOM	CAUSE	CORRECTIVE ACTION
Feet cold and wet	Glass Being held at incorrect angle.	Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling
Feet warm and wet	Improper Bladder Control	Stand next to nearest dog, complain about lack of house training
Beer unusually pale and tasteless	a. Glass empty. b. You're holding a Coors Lite	Get someone to buy you another beer
Opposite wall covered ! with fluorescent lights	You have fallen over backward.	Have yourself leashed to bar
Mouth contains cigarette butts, back of head covered with ashes	You have fallen forward	See above
Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet	a. Mouth not open b. Glass applied to wrong part of face	Retire to restroom, practice in mirror
Floor Blurred	You are looking through bottom of empty glass	Get someone to buy you another beer
Floor moving	You are being carried out	Find out if you are being taken to another bar
Room seems unusually dark	Bar has closed	Confirm home address with bartender. If staff is gone, grab a six-pack to go and hit the nearest fire escape door. Run
Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures	Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations	Cover mouth, open window, stick head outside
Everyone looks up to you and smiles	You are dancing on the table	Fall on someone cushy-looking
Beer is crystal-clear	It's water! Somebody is trying to sober you up	Punch him
! People are standing around urinals, talking or putting on makeup	You're in the ladies' room	Do not use urinal! Excuse yourself, exit and try the next door down the hall. Try to get phone numbers (optional)
Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear	You have been in a fight	Apologize to everyone you see, just in case it was them
Don't recognize anyone, don't recognize the room you're in	You've wandered into the wrong party	See if they have free beer
Your bedroom is painted gray, has a concrete floor and an interesting steel door. Toilet may be conveniently located next to your bunk	a. You're in jail b. You're in the navy	Sleep it off, you can always get out tomorrow. Don't talk to your new roommate, and under no circumstances sleep on your stomach
You are dancing to a Village People song, and your partner is wearing leather chaps	You're in a gay bar	Keeping your back to the ! wall, edge toward nearest exit. Do not accept offers for backrubs
! Your singing sounds distorted	The beer is too weak	Have more beer until your voice improves
Don't remember the words to the song	Beer is just right	Play air guitar

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